


Random Thoughts

by MissMegara



Category: Figure Skating RPF, Sports RPF
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-12
Updated: 2014-08-23
Packaged: 2018-02-12 19:45:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,160
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2122410
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MissMegara/pseuds/MissMegara
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Javier thinks he has a brilliant idea. Yuzuru thinks differently.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: This is a work of pure fiction, consisting of fictional characters living fictional lives.

"I think we should have sex."

The little red car Yuzuru was steering crashed into a yellow brick wall, ricocheted and fell down a sparkling blue waterfall. Javier had lent most of his video games to another skater from the Club, and now they were stuck here at his place on this rainy Saturday night, playing some silly little racing game for children. 

Yuzuru's fingers were still clutching the controller when he let his hands sink to his knees. A tiny little angel-mechanic appeared at the corner of the screen, putting his red car back on the rainbow-colored track. Why did those kiddy games always have to be full of so many freaky colors? How long could a person look at that without getting a headache?

Speaking of headaches. 

Yuzuru slowly turned towards Javier and looked at him with narrow eyes.  
"You say something?"

"I said I think we should have sex."

Okay. He had actually said it. And he didn't even blink when he said it again. 

"Um... right now?"

"Yeah, we totally could, but it's more of a general idea."

"Are you kidding?"

"No, I'm totally serious about this."

Yuzuru could feel how his mouth was getting dry because it had been open for quite some time now. He forced his lips together, swallowed hard and tried to figure out what he should say next. He just couldn't think of anything, so he passed the task off to the only other person in the room, who was sitting right next to him on the couch.

"Explain," he said with a strained voice and carefully placed the controller on the coffee table in front of him.

"Well, I know that you're gay."

Yuzuru blinked at him, waiting for the rest of a sentence that never came.  
"Yes," he replied warily and without actually separating his teeth from one another, "I know that, too."

There was one more thing he knew: Javier most certainly was not. So what the hell?

"It's like this, I...," Javier dropped his controller onto the floor and switched off the TV. He turned to the side and looked Yuzuru straight in the eye. "I just thought of this like a minute ago, so it's not really all completely thought out, but I think this could totally work for both of us."

The only thing more weird than the request itself was Javier's whole attitude. He looked and sounded completely like himself, no embarrassment, no tension, no insecurity. He was just Javier, being his usual delightful self, smiling and talking like all he did was offer Yuzuru another cup of tea. Actually he was even more himself than usual and seemed extremely excited about this supposedly brilliant idea.

"Then explain," Yuzuru repeated quietly while trying to keep it together.

"It's nothing serious, it's not like I'm in love with you or anything."

Yuzuru couldn't even begin to describe the face he must have made at that moment. Was that supposed to be a good thing or reassuring or was he just saying shit to make sounds come out of his mouth?

"I thought we could make some kind of arrangement."

"Maybe you should arrange sex with girlfriend? Remember her?"

"Well, that's kinda the issue here. Somehow this has turned into more of a long-distance relationship, because most of the time we're apart. She has always stuff going on and I have training all the time and then there are competitions and the ice shows and who knows what else."

None of this was really news to Yuzuru. It was one of the reasons why he himself had never had a serious relationship before, because there was just no room for it with his current lifestyle. How could he build and maintain a relationship with somebody if there was simply no time to do any of that? And, well, him being gay and not wanting the whole world to know about it didn't exactly help either. 

"So... you break up with girlfriend?"

"What? No, of course not."

Yeah, sure, of course not. Why would he even think that? His straight friend had just told him that he wanted to have sex with him and then went on about how the relationship with his girlfriend kinda sucked. How would the crazy idea of a breakup even come into play? 

"Then why you want sex with me?"

"Well, I thought we could help each other out here."

"Help out?"

Maybe Javier had some sort of brain damage. He had hit the ice pretty hard when he fell on that quad yesterday.

"It's really not that complicated. I don't want to break up with my girlfriend and I could never cheat on her and sleep with another girl."

"But you could sleep with me?"

"Yeah, I mean, that's different."

Yuzuru leaned forward and stared at him with his mouth half-opened. He tried really hard to find any indication on his face that would tell him that all this was just one big tasteless joke. Sometimes Javier could have a really crappy sense of humor. But no such luck.

"Are you stupid?" Yuzuru finally asked, still speaking very calmly, although he was getting more and more pissed off by the second. "Sex with me is not different. It's still sex and it's still cheating."

"Well, we'll just have to agree to disagree about that."

There was definitely some brain damage going on in that thick head of his.

"I just thought that we both could get something out of this. I mean, we're friends, right? Really good friends."  
Yuzuru didn't question their friendship, but right now he had serious doubts about Javier's sanity.  
"And it's not like you have anything going on relationship-wise. Or is there some guy I don't know about?"

Yuzuru only shook his head, hoping that Javier would finally get to the part where he'd explain this crazy idea.

"Well, I, like, just thought that you and me spend an awful lot of time together. You know, training, competitions, ice shows, whatever. You don't have anybody and my girl is usually at the other end of the world."

Yuzuru shook his head again and raised his eyebrows even further, if that was at all possible. A few more inches and they would reach his shoulder blades. 

"You can't tell me that you don't get frustrated from time to time and just want to get laid. And I think us having sex would be the perfect solution. We both get what we need and that's it."

Maybe it wasn't too late to turn back the clock, because he certainly could've done without _that_ explanation. There were several things wrong with this moment. Of course there was the fact that Javier had just declared him a convenient fuck. Which was probably the most flattering thing any one person had ever said to him. Hopefully he wasn't blushing too much. But the most damning aspect was surely _that it was Javier_ , for heaven's sake. It was his friend, his very, very straight friend who had never displayed any inclination towards anything even remotely homoerotic. 

This was beyond crazy. There was no way in hell they could even discuss this.

"No."  
Right now this really was the only answer Yuzuru could give him.

"That's it? Just... no?"

"Just no."

Never ever in no way or lifetime, not even if the sun was about to explode and swallow the earth, or if them having sex would bring about world piece and retroactively undo every crime ever committed in this universe.  
But _no_ would suffice for now.

"Hm."  
Javier chewed on his lower lip and then sighed. He picked up the controller, put his feet on the coffee table and turned the TV back on.  
"Maybe you could just think about it and then we'll talk again."

The only thing Yuzuru thought about right now was why he didn't remember falling through a wormhole that had brought him all the way to Bizarro World. And he wasn't sure if he had booked a return ticket for this trip to hell.

It took Javier almost two full minutes until he paused the game again, slumped down on the couch and looked at Yuzuru with his best puppy face impression.

"So, that's still a _no_ to the sex question, right?"

Yuzuru dropped his controller and threw his head around. Preface was obviously not on the menu today, Javier just kept blurting out those things without any prior warning whatsoever.

"How do you say _no_ in Spanish?"

"Ha, you know what? That's actually pretty much the same word."

"Then why don't you understand it?"

Javier scratched his head and muted the TV. Thank God, because that stupid game was not only packed with crazy colors that could make you go blind, but also full of _music_ , to use the term loosely, that was composed by somebody who obviously hated ears.

"Yeah, I'm sorry, maybe I shouldn't have asked you for sex."

"Maybe?"

Javier turned towards him and poked him with one finger in the upper arm.  
"But we could do other stuff."

"What is wrong with you?"

"Nothing, I just thought... you know, we're both hot and we're both not getting any, so, what the hell."

Yes, _what the hell_ indeed, he was very right about that. Yuzuru couldn't believe that he actually had to point this out now.

"You know that I'm a man, yes?"

Javier squeezed one eye shut and crinkled his nose.  
"Yeah, so am I. Is that a problem for you? I thought that's what the whole being gay thing was about, isn't it?"

" _You're not gay!_ "

How the hell did he even have to say this? And still all Javier did was shrug his shoulders and wiggle his head a little more.

"I might be a little, I don't know. I've never tried it. But see, that's perfect, that's also something you could help me with."

Yuzuru now flat out burst into laughter and pressed both hands in front of his face. This was either some kind of deranged fever dream or Javier was messing so badly with his head, it wasn't even funny anymore. 

"First you ask me for sex and then you want to find out if you're maybe a little gay?"

Javier only smiled at him sheepishly while rapidly nodding his head. Yuzuru's index finger described little circles next to his head, indicating to Javier that it might be a good idea to again think about what he had just said.

"Oh, I get it. Okay, so maybe I should have asked those two things in reverse, right?"

"You think?"

Besides the fact that he had better never asked any of those questions at all, the other way around would at least have been slightly more reasonable.

"No, no, you're absolutely right, this makes total sense. Would you do that for me?"

"Would I do what?"

"This whole figuring out part first. We could do something easy, like kissing. If I don't like that, the rest would be completely off the table, right?"

Yuzuru snorted and began to laugh again. The words he heard sounded absolutely insane, beyond insane to be more precise. But the way Javier said them, with such excitement and conviction, it was just too surreal to be true.

Was this actually happening?  
Was there really only one way out of this?


	2. Chapter 2

"Will you shut up if I let you kiss me?"

Javier displayed the broadest of smiles as his face lit up like a Christmas tree .  
"Yeah, absolutely. Well, unless I like it, but then we can still have a talk about that sex thing, right?"

Yuzuru just stared at him with his mouth opened wide and once again shook his head. By now he didn't even know anymore if this was cause for laughter or tears.

"Yes, sure, whatever."

Yuzuru didn't have any time to react - not that he would've known what to do anyway - when Javier suddenly leaped onto him and sat over his lap. He softly brushed the bangs aside and ran his fingers through Yuzuru's hair. Then he carefully palmed his face, leaned in closely and took a deep breath.

"Your hair smells awesome. What is that?"

Was he being serious?  
"Um... shampoo."

Javier's hands glided all over Yuzuru's cheeks and neck while carefully turning his head from one side to the other. Yuzuru's gaze wandered, erratically and aimlessly, but it always came back to Javier's lips since he was still waiting for that impending kiss he'd been promised. Threatened with. Whatever. Anything was better than looking him straight in the eye, because the overly fascinated expression on his face was a bit irritating.

Javier didn't seem to realize Yuzuru's confusion while he gingerly examined his face in every detail.

"You look really pretty."

Yuzuru giggled silently and there was absolutely no way he could've held back that grin. Sure, he'd been told stuff like that before, but to hear it from Javier of all people was simply beyond words.

"Thanks... I think. Now get it over with."

"Shh, don't rush me." 

Javier's voice had evaporated to a mere whisper. He repeatedly ran his thumb over the same spot on Yuzuru's cheek as if to prepare it, before he finally touched it with his lips. He kissed him repeatedly, every time moving a little further towards the center until he had reached the corner of his mouth. Yuzuru didn't move and focused on his own hands which were pressed flat against his chest. He didn't want to encourage anything, this was strange enough as it was. Strangely exciting, but strange nonetheless. 

Javier put one hand around Yuzuru's throat, leaned back a little and smiled at him funny with his lips tightly pressed together.

"I can feel your pulse racing."

Woops. That wasn't good. The idea was to end this episode by sacrificing a kiss, not turn this into something. His stupid body had better stick to the plan here.

"Can you just do it, please?"

Javier moved his hand to the back of his neck and held him firmly as he leaned in closely again. He made their lips brush against each other, just enough so that their contact would count as a touch, but not yet enough to be considered a real kiss. He seemed almost spellbound by those flimsy touches that consisted of little more than the mingling of breath. It took forever until the paper-thin gap between them finally disappeared, and Yuzuru wasn't even sure if it was Javier who had ultimately closed it. Their lips met and parted again and again, filling the air with soft little smacking noises.

Yuzuru's eyelids slowly dropped, and so did his hands until they settled on Javier's thighs. It had admittedly been a while since he'd been with someone, and as it turned out this didn't feel half as awkward as he had feared. When Javier's tongue gently pushed against his lips, he didn't hesitate one moment to open them and return his kiss. If anything it was Javier who suddenly seemed to back away, but Yuzuru wouldn't let him just yet. He slipped his tongue through Javier's lips and kept their mouths linked for another few moments, until Javier finally pulled away for good and sat up straight. He seemed confused and it almost looked like he was chewing on something while his jaw moved from left to right.

"Hm. Weird. Let me try again."

Javier palmed his face and without any further ado forced his tongue inside again. He let it drag along Yuzuru's tongue with a stunningly slow slide that ended with a very skilful twirl, and then he started the same motion all over again. And again. And again. A conspicuous shiver swept through Yuzuru's body when Javier finally stopped, pulled back and once more looked at him with that same baffled expression on his face.

"Why do you taste like strawberries?"

Really? _That_ was the confusing part right now? _That_ ?

"I ate candy," he answered quietly, trying not to let his irritation shine through too much.

"Oh. Yeah. I guess that would explain it."

"Great." At least Javier had it all figured out now, then maybe this lunacy could finally come to an end. "Does that mean we're done here?"

"Hey." Javier sounded like a sulky child that was about to throw a tantrum. "Was I that bad?"

"What?" Somehow this was moving in a very wrong direction. "No, not exactly."  
Or maybe even not at all. Which was kind of the most recent problem here, because this was _not_ supposed to become a thing. 

"Then why do you want to stop?"

"Because…" That was pretty much the only reason he could come up with right now, so he just rolled his eyes and sighed once again. "We had a deal. I let you kiss me and then..." 

He stopped midsentence when Javier's fingers suddenly ran across his lips and squeezed them lightly.

"Do you know that your lips feel like really fluffy cushions?" 

How on earth could this only be the second creepiest thing he had said tonight? 

"No, cushions is not quite right, they are just so..." Javier let his tongue smoothly sweep along Yuzuru's lower lip and then kissed him again, very lightly but through a sensual moan that was overflowing with excitement. "It's more like kissing a bubble bath."

Okay, that was it. He had obviously lost his mind. Yuzuru tried to respond something and finally end this madness for good, but he didn't get the chance. Javier had apparently decided that they weren't done yet, and before Yuzuru knew what was happening he got pressed into the couch by another kiss. Well, as long as his tongue was preoccupied with this, Javier could at least not talk any more nonsense about kissing bubble baths and what not. And one thing had to be said in his defense: he at least really knew what he was doing.

Javier's approach was a mixture of extreme precision and complete sloppiness. Sometimes he'd just let himself fall into their kiss while his body seemed to have lost either control or interest. His movements then slowed down to a point where he almost stopped and his tongue was pretty much just uselessly dangling down Yuzuru's throat until he nearly choked on it. If he'd went any further he could've easily removed his appendix. But most of the time he was impeccably controlled in his motions. He'd nip Yuzuru's lower lip and lightly suck on it before he flicked his tongue in and out of his mouth, forcing Yuzuru to come and get it for himself if he wanted any more of this. And he fell for it every time, practically chased after Javier's tongue as it retreated into his mouth and kissed him back with an eagerness that could in no way be considered anything like a sacrifice anymore.

At some point even Yuzuru had no longer the intention of stopping anytime soon. With every touch he could feel that tingling sensation in his stomach getting more intense. It wasn't exactly in his stomach though, but substantially lower than that. In any case it was definitely in the vicinity of _down there_ and nowhere near the _up here_ part, which was usually heavily involved in any decision making. He clasped Javier's shirt with both hands, because by now he didn't trust himself anymore and he couldn't allow his fingers to roam free and do who knows what. 

Dammit. It really had been way too long since he'd last been kissed like that. Either that or Javier truly had some mad skills. One way or the other, he was screwed. He should never have allowed this to happen in the first place.  
He really should end this now.  
He absolutely should.  
Maybe just one more minute.  
Or two.

But the decision was ultimately taken away from him when Javier suddenly stopped.

"I think we should talk about the sex option again."

Fantastic, a reality check. That suggestion had certainly snapped Yuzuru out of it within a second.

"No, we should not."

"It kinda feels like you're getting in the right mood for it."

"You're wrong, I'm not."

"I might not be as gay as you, but I'm still a guy." Javier pushed his hips down and slowly moved back and forth on top of Yuzuru's lap. "And I know what I'm sitting on here."

Yuzuru desperately tried to keep a straight face and not give him the satisfaction. Stupid body. Sometimes that thing really was utterly useless. Javier kept grinding against him, and Yuzuru could've kicked himself when that groan he'd tried to suppress finally found its way out of his mouth. His head had not yet lost control completely, and he was still trying to think of a way to stop this while Javier kept pushing against him harder and harder. The overly pleased face Yuzuru was looking at didn't help in the slightest, so he tried to turn away. But Javier wouldn't let him, kept his face palmed with both hands and forced him to look at him. Which was exactly why Yuzuru suddenly realized that there was something different about Javier. And in his case it was far away from the _down there_ section.

Yuzuru grabbed him by the chin and held his wobbling head in place.  
"You don't look good."

"Oh, that's not a nice thing to say. And after I told you that you're so very pretty."

"No, I mean... stop it!" Yuzuru tightened the grip on his face when Javier tried to kiss him again. "You're eyes don't look normal."

"That's also not very nice."

"I'm serious, you're eyes look really big. Do you feel good?"

"I feel fantastic." He brushed Yuzuru's hand aside and again pressed him hard into the couch. "But I would feel even better if you..."

"No! No sex!" Yuzuru really had about enough now. He tried to push Javier off, but he had clasped the backrest with both hands and held him down pretty good. "Now you make me angry. Tell me what is wrong, you don't look normal and you behave crazy."

Javier took a very deep breath and while he slowly exhaled his flapping lips made that never-ending motorboat sound.

"Well, okay, so, maybe I should tell you." He loosened his grip and let go of the backrest. "Actually, maybe I should've told you this, like, before, probably." He leaned back a little and rubbed his index fingers in a circular motion over Yuzuru's face. "But that didn't really seem like a good idea because then you totally would've said no, but I guess I really should tell you, because it might just be that..."

"Ah, stop it!" Yuzuru pushed his arms aside and smacked both hands against Javier's cheeks to stop his babbling. "You freak me out! What is wrong with you?"

"Nothing is wrong, it's just..." He noisily sucked in his lower lip and then released it with a squeaky pop. "I'm maybe just a teeny tiny very small little bit... stoned."

Yuzuru stared at him without moving even one single muscle in his face and slowly let his hands sink down.  
"You're what?"

Javier pressed both hands against his temples and pointed with the index fingers towards the ceiling.  
"I'm a little high."

Yuzuru needed another moment to process that information. Maybe he had just misunderstood. This damn language had so many confusing words and right now Javier wasn't exactly Mr. Articulateness. And he honestly couldn't believe that he had really heard what he thought he had heard.

"You... took drugs?"

"Noooo." Javier looked at him dead serious and franticly shook his head, but within the blink of an eye the goofy grin had returned. "I ate cookies." His voice suddenly had an uncanny resemblance with a chipmunk. Then he stuck out his tongue and started to giggle. "Cookie is a funny word. I never noticed that. Cookie. Cookie. Cooookie."

Okay, now he could believe it. He was totally high.  
"Why would you do that?"

"I was bored."

Of course. That sounded very reasonable. He was bored, got high and then wanted to have sex with whoever was closest. The usual routine.

Javier abruptly jumped off of him, mumbled something about needing to pee and walked out the room, leaving Yuzuru to sit alone on the couch, staring slightly confused into the open space. For a moment he considered to just get the hell out of there, since he didn't exactly relish the thought of having to deal with a spaced out Javier for the rest of the night. And how should he know if this was already as bad as it would get or if he was about to turn even more crazy.

Yuzuru sighed and let his head sink onto his chest. No, of course he couldn't leave him alone. God only knew what he would do and Yuzuru would never be able to forgive himself if anything happened to Javier just because he chickened out and ran away from here. This day now officially sucked.

Yuzuru heard the door open and close behind him, and then Javier shuffled back into the room. Yuzuru startled for a moment, because Javier looked as white as a sheet.

"Are you okay?"

"I don't really feel so good." He contorted his face and rubbed his stomach with both hands. "Is it okay if we wait a little with the sex and I just lay down for a bit?"

"Um... no, if you want to go to bed you can... hey, what are you..."

Okay, so going to bed was not actually the plan here. Javier stretched out on the couch and snuggled his face into Yuzuru's lap. That was not exactly an area where Yuzuru wanted his head to be right now.

"You're always really nice to me, I really like that about you," he muttered, wrapped one arm around his legs and rubbed his face a little more on Yuzuru's thighs. "I don't even know why I'm so tired, it's still so early."

Was this normal? This didn't seem normal. Yuzuru had no idea what would be considered _normal_ for someone who was probably stoned out of his mind. He barely had any experience dealing with drunk people. Sometimes a few of the older skaters would get plastered at the banquets after big competitions, but even they were mostly drunk within reason and not "run around, ask random people for sex and then rub your face on their crotch" drunk. 

For a few minutes Javier was just lying there quietly and it almost seemed like he had fallen asleep. But all of a sudden he started to scramble, got up and kneeled down on the couch. Yuzuru reflexively moved back a little when Javier leaned in so closely that he could already feel his breath on his skin again.

"Can I ask you a question?"

"Again?"

Javier furrowed his brow and rubbed his eyes with both hands.  
"What do you mean, again? Did I already ask you something?"

"Huh?"  
Just when he thought that this couldn't get any weirder...

"I think I've been thinking about this for some time because I think I kinda always wanted to try this so I'm just gonna ask you now before I forget it again." Javier put one hand on Yuzuru's cheek and moved in even closer. "Can I kiss you?"

" _Huh_ ?"  
First the wormhole and now a time loop? What the fuck was going on here? 

But before he knew it Javier had already started to kiss him again. Not only that, but he almost instantly pushed him down on his back and practically laid on top of him while his kiss went from careful probing to hot and heavy in record time. For a second Yuzuru wondered if this was Javier's usual M.O. or if his behavior was owed to the fact that he was high as a kite. Because, after all, this was pretty bold, considering that he'd obviously forgotten that this was not their first rodeo. And just a little while ago it had taken him forever to even kiss him, not to mention pin him down on the couch and sneak one hand under his shirt while his tongue went on an ever so desperate adventure in Yuzuru's mouth.

If he'd actually tried to seriously think all this through, it would probably have gotten very confusing. But Yuzuru had lost interest in over-thinking this, he just let Javier do as he pleased. In his state of mind there was no reasoning with him anyway, and as long as all he wanted to do was make out a little, well, that he'd be able to endure for a little while longer. If things went too far, he could still pull the plug at any time. He could totally do that, no problem at all.


	3. Chapter 3

When Javier woke up the next morning, the first thing he noticed was a pounding ache in the back of his head. He shoved the blanket aside, rubbed his eyes and tried to sit up, but it took him more than one try because the pain would make him slightly dizzy every time. He didn't know right away where he was, but when his sight and his head became a little clearer, he realized that he must have fallen asleep on the couch. 

He looked around and saw Yuzuru, who was sitting quietly in the small armchair in the corner of the room. The handheld game console he was playing covered almost his entire face but when he peeked over to him, Javier could see an amused smirk play around his lips.

"Good morning," he mumbled with a giggle that would've been much nicer to hear had it been about two octaves deeper. Then he immediately disappeared behind his toy again. "Maybe take blanket back or you will catch cold."

Javier didn't get it at first, but then hastily pulled the cover back over his lap.  
"Why am I lying naked on the couch?"

A snort and more snickering surfaced from behind the game console.  
"I don't know. You fall asleep on couch and I give you blanket." And a little goodnight kiss, but that detail he should probably keep to himself for now. "And then I go sleep in your bed, because I can't sleep on couch when you are there. And when I come back at morning, all your things lie around." Yuzuru quickly gazed over to Javier, only long enough to meet his eye for one second. "You don't remember last night?"

Right. Last night. The first pictures started to form in his mind's eye, but he couldn't place them all straight away.  
"Kinda... something... I don't know." Javier's thoughts were still a bit of a jumble and most of his memories were more than just a little blurry. 

Yuzuru finally put down his game and looked directly at Javier.  
"What _do_ you remember?"

Javier stared at him with a blank expression, his lips pressed to a thin line. Then he suddenly got up, wrapped the blanket around his waist and declared that he had to go to the bathroom. He nearly fell down when he tripped over the fabric and barely managed to stay on his feet. He threw the blanket aside, spouted some Spanish curses and rushed out of the room. It took quite a while until he came back. By now he had at least managed to get some sweat pants on, but apparently he still couldn't be bothered to put on a shirt. Or maybe he'd already forgotten that he was half naked, based on what had happened last night that was a distinct possibility.

"Sorry, I had to brush my teeth," he apologized for the delay while he scuffled around the couch. "I think I can still taste the... you know, the... weed. That's kinda disgusting."

"Really?" Yuzuru got up from the chair and sat down on the couch closely next to Javier. "You didn't taste like weed last night."

Javier's face rather accurately reflected his feelings at that very moment: embarrassment, awkwardness and the urgent wish for the earth to open up an swallow him whole. 

"Okay, so... all that actually happened, huh?" Javier still tried to avoid Yuzuru's gaze as far as possible. Which wasn't easy the way he kept staring at him from the side. "I was hoping I had dreamt most of it."

"I don't know what you dream, but things happened."

Javier sighed and rubbed his forehead. His head was hurting inside and out, up until now he didn't know that some of these parts were even able to hurt like that.  
"I shouldn't have eaten that second cookie, I've never been so out of it."

"You do this often?"

"No, of course not, I don't even... I had a really bad week, okay? And sometimes the neighbor girl shares a few cookies with me when she makes a batch, that's all."

"Then maybe next time you go ask her for sex."

Javier nearly jumped out of his skin when Yuzuru reached over and patted his leg.  
"Yeah, about that... I'm still a little fuzzy on what exactly I... what _we_ did last night, so... maybe you could just fill me in here?"

While Javier scratched his still hurting head, he caught another glimpse of Yuzuru's face. He had no idea how he should read that strange smile on his face, but he was pretty sure that he'd never seen him look like that before.

"If you don't remember maybe it's better I don't tell you."

Finally Javier forced himself to turn his head to the side, hoping that a little more eye contact might encourage Yuzuru to finally give him a more helpful answer.  
"Look, I... _we_... kinda made out a little, right?"

Yuzuru raised his eyebrows and looked him over with a suggestive smirk.  
"A little?"

"Alright, alright, so that was probably closer to foreplay." Javier was still hoping that his memory was way more off, but his head seemed to be in a better condition than he'd thought. "But all that wouldn't be so bad, I could live with that."

"Thank you, I'm happy that I'm not so bad."

"No, I didn't mean it like..." Javier groaned and held his head with both hands because it still felt like it was about to explode. "Can you please just tell me if we had sex or not?" Yuzuru didn't answer and instead started to giggle again. He really had to tone that down, the noise was unbearable. "I don't think that we did but my head doesn't exactly feel like it's supposed to and I just need to know, so... just tell me that nothing happened last night."

Yuzuru scratched his cheek with one finger and let his eyes wander around the room.  
"Not really _nothing_ happened."

"You're killing me here." Javier leaned back to support his aching head with the backrest and closed his eyes for a moment. "I think I remember that we were in the bedroom."

"We were."

"Okay, so, um... how did we get there?"

"Walking."

"No, I mean... you know, usually bedrooms only get involved when sex is about to break out. The last thing I remember is that we ended up in my bed together and then there's just... _nothing_ , so... did we or didn't we?"

Yuzuru still hesitated, but he knew that he wouldn't be able to stall forever. He could tell that Javier was eager to get some answers. Who wouldn't be after a night like that? But since there were obviously a few gaps in his memory, Yuzuru was still contemplating how much he should remind him of.

 

Last night Javier had practically attacked him on that couch. But unexpectedly enough Yuzuru didn't put up much of a fight, because unfortunately Javier turned out to be a really good kisser, turning Yuzuru's willingness to sacrifice a simple kiss into a dangerous craving for more. A lot more. 

Javier had taken off his shirt and then smirked at him with a look that flat out stated "I know exactly what you're thinking, don't even bother denying it." And he wasn't wrong. From the neck down Javier was in fact very much Yuzuru's type. The part from the neck up wasn't too shabby either. But he'd never looked at his friend this way because, for obvious reasons, he was absolutely in the no-sexual-thoughts-allowed zone. And up until now it had been no problem whatsoever to keep him exactly there.

But Javier really did have a great body, he'd known that all along. He'd sure seen it often enough. He was buff, muscular and, dare he even think it, outright manly. His shoulders formed this beautiful, smooth curve that just waited for someone's hands to trace it all the way to those strong arms. His perfectly toned chest was practically begging to be touched, and that small trail of hair that started right under his belly button and then disappeared under the waistband, it was nothing less than an invitation in Yuzuru's eyes.

But he'd certainly never looked at Javier that way, absolutely not, nothing could be further from the truth. And right now he totally didn't imagine how he should just rip the rest of his clothes off and lick every inch of his body before he'd blow more than just his mind.

Only moments later Javier started to pull off Yuzuru's shirt and nearly ripped his head off in the process because he was being so hasty. Once he'd gotten it off, he suddenly slowed down again and only brushed his fingertips over the naked skin of his body, like he had just remembered that he shouldn't be so rough with something so delicate. He didn't break eye contact for a second as he slowly leaned down. Only at the very last moment did he look away because he needed to move a little to the side for his lips to reach the nipple he was aiming for. With the meekest touch he made Yuzuru moan softly and slightly arch his back, causing Javier to revert to the fervor that had been driving him all the while before. He sucked and nibbled on every piece of skin he could reach, tightened his grip and held Yuzuru's twitching body down as it tried to escape him.

What followed was a lot of fumbling and groping and touching and trying, but when they weren't busy exploring the other one's body, there was still the kissing. Lots of kissing, that part shouldn't be forgotten. Those kisses kept coming back, wet and sloppy and exhilarating and never failing to push things a little further than they'd already gone. They still didn't let go of each other as they finally made their way to the bedroom. The next pieces of clothing started to come off and Yuzuru had been freed of most of them when they finally fell into bed together. But when he tried to undo Javier's pants, his fingers were abruptly stopped and once again he got pushed down on his back.

"You wait here, I'll be right back," Javier whispered before giving him another one of those devastating kisses that would leave Yuzuru even more breathless than he already was, "I'll go and get some condoms." And with that he disappeared from the room.

Yuzuru waited, lying motionless on the bed, staring into the dark, still thinking about the fact that going through with this was probably the worst idea he'd ever had. But for all he knew this was one of the things that happened when a person was intoxicated, maybe this was something Javier had always secretly wanted to do. Or maybe he was just fucking high and would regret this the next morning, which would be not only awkward but most likely really bad. And he sure as hell didn't want to risk their friendship just because they both needed to get their rocks off. And yet he couldn't bring himself to just get up and walk away.

He kept waiting, eagerly waiting for Javier to come back and finally, finally finish what he had started. But moments turned into minutes and he was losing patience. Did he have to go buy those condoms first or what took him so long? He called out Javier's name, but when he still didn't get an answer, he went looking for him.

He found him lying on the couch, sound asleep, with his head stretched back at a weird angle, one leg hanging down the side and one arm stuffed under his chest. All in all it seemed like a very uncomfortable position.  
Yuzuru looked around the room. Suddenly everything felt a lot smaller in here. The game controllers were still lying on the carpet next to the coffee table, and so was his shirt. He picked it up and put it on again. For a minute or two he kept standing in the middle of the room, waiting for something to happen while he scratched the back of his hand. He could hear the springs in the couch creaking when Javier moved a bit. Yuzuru took off the one shoe Javier was wearing and at least moved his leg onto the couch so he wouldn't fall down, then he got a blanket from the bedroom and covered him. He squatted down in front of him and gently caressed his face. Javier kindly answered by first making a gargling noise and then snoring like an asthmatic panda. Lovely. 

Yuzuru sat there for a little while longer with his hand on Javier's face, softly letting his thumb brush across his cheek. He hadn't even noticed before how scratchy it was. At least he looked like he was okay now. He should just sleep it of. It was probably for the best. It took Yuzuru another moment to tear himself away from his sleeping friend. He stroked his hair one last time, kissed him on the forehead and went back into the bedroom to go to sleep. 

And just like that it was over. 

 

Yuzuru got rudely pulled back into the here and now by Javier, who was again pleading for an answer. By now he sounded pretty desperate and the look on his face was only one wrinkle away from exasperation, so Yuzuru decided that it was time to end the torture. 

"No, we did not have sex."

But it certainly wasn't for lack of trying. He wouldn't tell Javier about all the details, he didn't need to know. That look of relief on his face made clear that he really shouldn't know too much. 

"You're not just saying that, are you?" he asked once again just to be sure. "There really was no sex of any kind, right?" 

Yuzuru shook his head and Javier looked like the weight of a whole Zamboni had just been lifted off his mind. 

"Okay, good. Good." He took a deep breath and puffed his cheeks before he slowly let the air out through almost closed lips. He didn't look at Yuzuru when he moved his arm over and squeezed his hand for a second before he immediately let go again. "Thank you."

Yuzuru tried to meet his eyes, but Javier was busy staring anywhere but in his direction.  
"For what?"

"For... I guess for not giving me what I asked you for. I sometimes get a little... horny when I'm high, but usually I don't try to..."

"Have sex with gay friends?"

"Yeah, something like that. And it would've been totally messed up if we actually... I mean, not that it's a bad thing, like, in general, because you're a guy, that doesn't bother me, it's just... you know, we're friends and colleagues and I'm with..." He paused, cleared his throat and hectically scratched his knees. "This is gonna stay between the two of us, right? You're not gonna tell anybody that we..."

"Of course I won't tell," Yuzuru interrupted him quietly, and once again he could hear this shaky sigh of relief that practically rumbled from Javier's chest.

"And... thank you, seriously, just... thanks, at least you have some self-control, because I was so spaced out I would have..."

"Don't worry about it."  
Yuzuru waved his hand and laughed, but it was a good thing that Javier's gaze was still fixated on the table. Javier kept thanking him for something that wasn't even close to what had happened and it made Yuzuru feel like a hypocritical prick. But telling the truth wouldn't help either of them, and the sound of Javier's voice worried him deeply. He was clearly upset, that much was obvious. But Yuzuru had no idea which part of last night it was that made him feel so uneasy and Javier wasn't being particularly clear about it.  
"I think it's good we did not do it," Yuzuru went on with a giggle that thankfully didn't sound too forced. "You're not really so good at kissing and all that."

Javier's head shot up and to the side.  
"Excuse me, what... ouch!" Javier stopped midsentence and whined silently while he kept rubbing his neck. "Dammit, I'm gonna be sore for days. I hate this couch."

"Me too."

Javier turned his head in surprise and winced again because his body was still punishing him for every move that he made.  
"What?"

"Your couch makes my back hurt."

"You've slept on that thing a hundred times and never said anything."

"What can I say?"

"I don't know, something. You could've easily slept..." 

Javier suddenly realized what would've been the only alternative in his apartment, and saying that out loud didn't seem like the best of ideas at the moment. It also didn't help that Yuzuru now looked at him with this funny smile and batted his eyes. 

"Wow," he said in a gentle voice and bit his lower lip, "you really _want_ me in your bed, huh?" 

Javier fought the urge to jump off the couch and exit the room through a window.  
"I feel like this conversation is going in the wrong direction."

"It's okay." Yuzuru scootched over until he was almost sitting in Javier's lap, and before Javier knew it, he had taken his hand and intertwined their fingers. "Why you never tell me that you want me so much?"

"Um, it's... no... no offense, but you're not my type."

Yuzuru squeezed his hand a little tighter and leaned his head against Javier's shoulder.  
"But last night you tell me I'm so pretty."

"Last night I was high."

Javier tried to free his hand but Yuzuru pulled it over and pressed it against his thigh.  
"Maybe idea was not so bad. We can have sex if you really want it." 

"Yeah, um, no, thanks, that's not... you don't have to do me any favors here. And like you said, I'm not good at all that stuff anyway."

"Then you need practice so you get better."

Javier again tried to get his hand back, but the more he pulled, the tighter Yuzuru held him.  
"That's... great, really, nice offer, but... I'd probably totally suck and..."

"That's okay." Yuzuru leaned so far over that Javier could feel his breath on his neck when he whispered, "I can teach you sucking. I'm really good at that." 

Javier frantically tried to think of a way out of this. It was his own damn fault, it really was, he knew that, he should have known better than to get high and not even tell him about it when they were alone in his apartment, but this now really went too far and who could've known that Yuzuru would actually go for it and maybe now he'd want to... Javier was _this_ close to a serious panic attack when he saw that little twitch around the corner of Yuzuru's mouth.

"Are you messing with me?"

The twitch swiftly turned into a grin and a giggle.  
"Yes, I am."

Javier forcefully pulled his hand from Yuzuru's grip and pushed him away.  
"You're such an ass!" He tried to sound annoyed but couldn't help laughing at the same time.

Yuzuru attempted to keep a straight face, but his giggling was again getting the better of him.  
"No, ass is for pros. You are amateur, we will start with..."

"Oh, shut up."

Javier didn't even flinch when Yuzuru got up, stood right in front of him and then leaned down so closely, their faces were barely one breath apart.  
"What, you don't like me anymore?"

"Sometimes I forget why I like you."

Yuzuru palmed his face and came even closer.  
"I think because you want to have sex with me," he said with an provoking smile and teasingly placed an air kiss right in front of Javier's lips. "I go to kitchen make tea. You want some?"


End file.
